I’m Going Crazy: The Mermaid

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August 22, 2019

It’s a slender creature with a long and flowing tail. Does It really understand what Its purpose is besides surfacing every once in a while to spit truths? Not entirely, no. It just knows three things to be true. Those three things are: the mermaid’s passion for science, its existence in the water, its thoughtful way of speaking.

Ask it if it’s a real mermaid and watch the mermaid wrinkle its nose in disgust. Don’t you know mermaids don’t exist? The mere question puts a look of puzzlement on its face as if It can’t understand how stupid you are but the fact It’s a mermaid still stands. It will react similarly to questions regarding whether or not It has legs. Of course not dummy. 

This creature of mystery came calling one sleepless night in the Colorado wilderness. As a very human girl lay still and sleepless, an entity emerged from the swirling currents of the ceiling above and whispered a hello. Once contact was made, the world unfolded and a eureka moment appeared as if out of the blue.

For years it seems my goal was always to fit into whichever mold struck my fancy. First was the prestigious world of journalism that came to tempt me. I enrolled in college with the intention of becoming a world-class journalist only to find that the fit was far from comfortable. Next to take hold of me was a love for science and the minds that taught it at my university. This one held fast for a long while.

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An Essay on Lucid Dreaming. My Experiences, Tips and Tricks

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August 21, 2019

My childhood bedroom holds the unique status of being able to induce lucid dreaming for myself. Time and time again, I am able to summon up some stored common sense and call my subconscious out for tampering with reality. Often, when the realization strikes, I am left to deal with the aftermath of a foiled plot. 

Disaster used to be the common closer to a dream that climaxes with my coming to. Planes would bury themselves into twisted structures off in the distance minutes after I looked at my dream hands and understood where I was. I suppose this is some sort of defense mechanism for my subconscious. Once discovered, it forces a response that has my conscious self yearning to escape back into reality.

I am trying to think what that might mean for what’s going on in my mind. What is subconscious me trying to hide? Or what is conscious me so afraid of when thinking about the idea of being trapped in a dream world forever? It’s odd…

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We Got Lost! A Reflection

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August 20, 2019

Something about being lost in the wilderness both frightens and inspires. Take it from me.

It’s our first full day in the secret treasure that is Mark’s AirBnB 30 minutes outside of Cortez. An untouched wilderness sits just beyond a brown picket fence. Just beyond a well-manicured lawn and thoughtfully placed decor is a formidable land. That juxtaposition of the two spaces, the tamed and wild, was one we should have considered a bit more close.

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Walden, CO

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August 19, 2019

We left the northern corner of Colorado today. Rising early to catch the sunrise, we watched with our coffees before hitting the road. The southern corner now awaits us and, as I drive, I reflect.

Here are the things I learned in Walden, Colorado.

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Alone Amongst Giants: A Day of Thought

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August 18, 2019

7:00 AM

Yannis rouses from slumber just after I do. I am sitting perched upon the leather couch in the main room. Sky is slowly waking herself up as Yannis and I conference over the evening before. The sky was unlike any we’d ever seen and we spent the return leg of our evening hike looking up at it in wonder. 

Yannis pours water from the cooler and sets it to boil whilst I watch the hummingbirds outside. I take a handful of trail mix and proceed to munch on it as we waited for the world’s coldest stove to boil our water. Skyler joins us shortly after and we wait together.

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I Saw My Best Friend On Holiday. It Was Great

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August 17, 2019

You can’t appreciate your own world without the company of people you love.

A tribute to the humans I love, have loved, will love. The number is small but meaningful. 

Existing in a world of social media, nonstop news coverage and a near dependence on smart phones blinds me often from what is most valuable. How grateful I am to take a step away from all of that and consider what fuels the good days. I think I may have the answer–or something close at least. 

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We Watched Beauty and the Beast the Night Before I Wrote This

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August 16, 2019

Disney archetypes.

The day before we left for our grand adventure into the untamed wilderness of Western Colorado, we spent the evening with my cousin and her young daughter. This new relative of mine was a cute and babbling mini human with a language only really understood by her mother and us after a few enthusiastic repetitions of the phrase. 

Her blue eyes reflected an intelligence that lied just beyond her grasp. The freedom to truly express that intelligence was still getting hooked up in her mind.

One thing she knew how to communicate was the need for a nightly edition of her family’s movie night. Always a Disney film, the four of us settled in to the couch to watch this evening’s chosen flick: Beauty and The Beast.

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