Me Being Obnoxious About Having Friends

August 11, 2019

Me, a Scorpio.

Writing everyday is helping ease me into a headspace where turning on the writing brain becomes easier to reach. As soon as I open a blank page, the words tend to flow from fingertip to screen. The difficult and unwavering part of this process continues to be choosing ideas to flesh out with words. 

I go through at least three ideas per day before settling on one. Often times, the post is published and I look back, lip bitten in wonder over the finished product. I want my writing to resonate with people more so than to act as a mere outlet for myself. At this point, I find the balance sits heavier on the “self” side. 

Trying to be relatable is difficult. I spent most of my childhood being anything but that. Never one to have more than one friend at a time, the majority of my evenings and weekends were spent within myself. Now I am in a position of great outward expression. So many people come into my life that I am entranced by and grow to love. I feel blessed and overwhelmed at once.

Apologies to the friends whom I sometimes blow off. I know I do that often. This overabundance of relationships is a pool I am still trying to acclimate to. I love it, but please bear with me.

I want you to know that my writing and this voice are an amalgamation of the individuals that touched me. I live as a mosaic of all of these folks regardless of where our relationship sits now. My mannerisms are never only my own. To be a social creature is a real treat and to discover the joys of having a real community about you is ever more. 

The middle of the month is nearing. I leave for a trip with a loved one in quite nearly 36 hours. Getting here through this month, my spirit is so lifted. I could cry over the joy these past few weeks at home brought me. I could cry over the upcoming return to my other home where my other loved ones live. 

I also love to swim. I’m a water sign. I think this whole spiel must have something to do with that. 

Love you.


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