Life, Loves, Changes of Plan

August 14, 2019

For Charlotte.

We sometimes think life comes easy. We construct a fabulous vision in our minds for what our future will look like. The details, from the grandest to the most minute, can sweep us away into a fantasy and the time spent pouring ourselves into that will inevitably convince us of its authenticity.

Life doesn’t work like that, though, does it. 

Planning for the future, as great as it is, is rarely set in stone. Time is a volatile and unpredictable beast to reckon with and its greatest threat–change– is one we cannot escape. Better than to make peace with the fact that, although we do craft grand dreams with people we hold dear to us in these moments, nothing is ever certain.

Storms of change roll through and tumble the great foundations we build in a moment’s notice. We are left there in the aftermath to forage for remains. The good news is that some things always remain. Our minds were built to cherish memories even as we march ever forward into the future. We culminate these bits of history and turn them into scales upon our flesh. 

Hobbies, mannerisms, dreams and desires, they all go through the wringer. The ones that manage to pass through are the ones meant to stick with us as components of our soul, our identity. 

I find heartbreak to be the most beautiful tragedy of humanity. This change, this storm, can quite nearly destroy us and sometimes succeeds. A metamorphosis such as this can send you plummeting to the very depths of misery it seems. My friends that experienced heartbreak tell me often that they wish this upon no one else and yet those that go through it, that live to see the light, are the ones I find most inspiring. 

Artists are particularly good at transforming this event into something beautiful. From pain comes joy, love, warmth, enlightenment above all. Wisdom from these traumas translates into art that elicits real and palpable emotion. It brings tears to your eyes when you see it. How can such an event breed such beautiful things?

I do not wish to know but cannot plan to avoid it. Love is giving someone every piece of you in hopes they protect it forever more. This is an impossible task.

Love never has a happy ending. And yet we yearn for it. It fulfills us; makes us grow as human beings. When it’s gone, all that remains are the sacred memories and the wisdom gained from such a ride.

To love is the most human thing. To be broken-hearted is a biological phenomenon. 

One cannot exist without the other. 

Time is an unforgiving foe. Change is a defeat we must learn to accept. To do so with grace is an art form. 

You will overcome these times. And that will birth a beauty I cannot even try to predict.


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